I write as the General Manager of The Grand, having been in place for a mere sneeze so far.  In a short space of time I have discovered that I have a great team of people, am in charge of a delightful hotel that loves my style of friendly hospitality and I work in a fabulous location.  So, having been basking in a stream of  satisfied customer comments for some time, imagine how I felt when 34 copies of the Sunday Times were delivered by my porters to my beautiful 4 star hotel bedrooms on Sunday, August 2nd! 

By midmorning I was beseiged by a number of irate guests, choking on the one sided, poorly written article in the colour magazine supplement, by a man whose name sounds like a poor man’s pizza.  Peppered with cheap shots, this piece of journalistic trash refers to my lovely hotel as a “large ugly building presumptuously called The Grand”, which he merely viewed from a distance – persumably too lazy to visit and enjoyed charming hospitality and arguably one of the best views in the UK.  I wonder, does he know ugly from beauty? 

I was saddened that his pathetic drivel denigrated Laurence Murrell who is one of Torquay’s most enduring and hardworking hoteliers.  I know that negativity and sensationalism sells newspapers but sadly, jaundiced claptrap, from someone who can quite obviously influence an audience, can have a huge impact on how a resorts like those English Riviera are perceived.  It does continue to provide great holidays that cater for all tourists who are sensible enough to visit glorious Devon – especially when the country needs the support of its own.  The more visitors, the faster one is able to work to get better!  So pizza man, next time constructive assistance please not demolition!

My first 4 weeks as a Duty Manager at The Grand hotel and I’m already being asked to show my literary prowess at blogging! 

Have you ever noticed that when you meet new people in a group, next time you come across them you think either they all look the same or you draw a blank when trying to remember anybody’s name?  Now multiply that tenfold and you have my dilemma – how to remember the names of over 130 staff – thank heavens for name badges!

Having surmounted this problem, my next test was to learn to find my way around the “Grand” maze.  Not only are there 4 floors of bedrooms, 5 function rooms, restaurant, bar and kitchen but also offices, cellars and a million store cupboards.  I seemed to get lost on a daily basis my first 2 weeks and at one point debated whether to get a sat nav device to guide me round.

I won’t bore you with details of all my introductions, training, induction and the paper work that goes with my new job other than to say that I used to think paper work was an excuse for managers to sit in the office all day drinking tea.  Fool me!  It hasn’t been the local steam engine smoking around here – it’s been my head!

If I have come to fear anything during my short time in the job, it’s my pager.  Firstly it makes me jump out my skin when it goes off (a lot), and secondly I get enveloped in this aura of intrepidation as I never know what Reception is going to say when I resp0nd.  Sometimes I get off lightly as it is just a car needing to be parked, a phone call to deal with or a department needing change or something.  Then every now and again it is a matter requiring a little more ingenuity of thought.  How do you deal with a beautiful day and a busy swimming pool that is filled not only with guests of all ages, shapes and sizes, but also feathered ones?  Yes, we have 2 resident ducks who return each winter/spring to do what animals do in the spring – create offspring.  Each year we call in the experts to move the parents and their new offspring to the local pond and that’s the end of it for another year.  This year it is different as our 2 ducks have reared and bid farewell to their offspring and returned to the Grand, having decided that it’s their favourite home. They seem quite happy to swim around with guests and fortunately our guests are quite taken with them.  They (the ducks) have also been known to hop upstairs to the door of the lounge to say hello!  I wonder if they would be so bold if they knew how often duck features on our menus!

1. You have ever sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for 8 different managers

2. ‘Going for cocktails and dinner’ is NOT your idea of a nice evening.

3. When someone asks you your exact job profile, you lie

4. You really get excited about 2% pay increase

5. You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet

6. It’s dark on your drive to and from work

7. Communication is something your ‘group ‘ is having problems with

8. You see a good looking person and you know it’s a visitor/guest

9. Food left over from a banquet or meeting is your main staple diet

10. You forget what you look like in anything but a suit

Unlike Duty Managers I have the small luxury of starting work at 9am but today is more unusual than most as I have been invited to Paignton Zoo and Living Coasts to take a look around the local attractions!

I take a leisurely stroll from my house to meet our Reservations Supervisor – Jaz, at the main entrance. We are directed through to the meeting room where the plan for the day is explained. At this point the heavens open, rain pours and we are off to see the monkeys and ‘Croc swamp’ that is under construction. We wander around to see the camels, giraffes and elephants – at this point I am boring poor Jaz to death with the tales of my African adventures!

Heading back to the main entrance we are met with a waiting open top tour bus and encouraged to sit on the top deck … so with a chill in the air and rain easing off we took on the challenge! Passing the Grand Hotel we could see the workmen hard at work ‘drinking tea’ on the roof! At this point that we decided that red noses were not attractive so we abandoned the top deck and ran to sit downstairs!
Arriving at Living Coasts we had a lovely lunch provided before the guided tour. We walked amongst the Penguins and Puffins, watching them eat and perform their mating rituals. Of course when you keep flying birds under a large net inevitably there are going to be some ‘embarrassing moments’, (for some strange reason people seem to think it is lucky to be *@#”*” on by a bird from a great height) but thankfully we came out unscathed!

Then we were back on the bus (downstairs this time) to head home. See most people think that this job might be all about figures, but I think on days like today it goes to show it can be fun. Honest!

A Morning in the Life of the General Manager

I wake up at about 6:30am, though not sure why as I wasn’t planning on going in until 9am today – must be conditioned into not needing much sleep.

In the hotel for about 8am, walk through the Reservations office and empty my tray, it looks like the Reservationist is still asleep, as when I say good morning I get no response, I guess it’s still early

On through the Conference office (empty and awaiting arrival of the team) so I just have a quick look at the day’s business to see if there are any last minute changes. At times function sheets would be better off being blank pieces of paper that the operations team fill in as they go (no, seriously our events team are extremely good with their information). Onto Reception and as always they are “full of beans” I guess that goes with the territory for that type of job.

Next stop I switch the lights on in the bar as it appears the early Duty Manager has forgotten. As I approach the bar I hear the northern twang of Suey who is for some reason always in at about 7:45am even though her shift doesn’t start until 9am. She’s just trying to make sure that she has enough teaspoons and cups to get her through the morning coffees – she mentions that the restaurant staff have taken them all again as they are having a busy breakfast and that she will go through and give them a hand. That’s typical of Suey, always helping everyone else – probably why she got the Employee of the Year Award!!!

Next into the Restaurant, my old hunting ground, there is no-one on the door but a few staff buzzing around, I go through to the kitchen to find the Restaurant Team Leader having a chat with the Duty Manager while he’s eating in cooked breakfast. I ask the Team Leader politely to go back into the Restaurant and look after his guests, he tells me was just asking a question about this evening.

I then have a brief chat with the Duty Manager who tells me we have run out of mushrooms and two staff from Housekeeping are off sick. I ask who’s getting the mushrooms and he tells me the early Porter. I’ve only been in 10 minutes and haven’t got near my desk yet or had a cup of tea!!!!!

Up to my office to find one of our Marketing team sat in the office to tell me about our marketing stats – something that I always struggle to understand (my background is in food and beverage management, and marketing has never been my strong point). At least there’s good news on that front.

By 8:30 the office staff are starting to arrive and with that comes the gossiping about the previous night’s TV and what everyone has done. I’ll check my e-mails and respond where necessary. My PA comes in for 9am and with her comes the first cup of tea of the day (the first of many I may add!) and everything suddenly starts to seem better.

I then get bombarded with telephone calls and if I dare to walk around the ground floor I know that I’ll get bombarded with questions from every member of staff I come across. I made the grave mistake of walking through the conference office yesterday and got stuck in there for nearly an hour – when will I ever learn!!!!!

The rest of the morning is taken up with forecasting sales and wages, then it’s off to the morning meeting to brighten everyone else’s day, or not dependent on the outcome at the end of business the previous day!!!!!

Soon it will be lunch time – a light bite or proper tucker – given my required energy levels, I’ll have some of everything!

It’s Saturday night and after looking after a large event comprising of people who apparently don’t need any sleep to function, I make my way up to bed at around 4am. I say around 4am because at this point I have no understanding of what day it is, let alone the hour. I console myself with the fact that I am not on the early shift, usually starting at 7am, and can have a lie in, as I have one of those rare things that seem to come round once in a blue moon…a day off!

As I tuck myself into bed with a cup of tea and munch on the biscuits that are supplied in my room (not chocolate chip, but I’ll make do!) I dream of playing in the Premier League, winning the lottery and most of all not being woken up for some emergency between now and when the next Manager comes on duty in 3 hours…not much to ask for is it?

7.02am: Ring Ring, Ring Ring.

Me: Hello?
Colleague: Hey, sorry to wake you, do you know where the keys are, they’re not where they usually are?

Me: Have you looked properly?
Colleague: Yeah, I’ve had everything out, they’re definitely not there.
Me: Do you need me to come out?
Colleague: I’ll look again for you, but I’m sure they’re not here.
Me: Ok, thanks. Ring me back in a minute when you know.

N.B. From how it reads I sound fairly reasonable…not the case. You have to imagine a guy who has had 2 hours sleep, heard the phone ring and thinks it was the fire alarm, once he’s got up and realised it’s the phone, smacked his knee in the dark, and fallen over his own shoes!

7.04am: Ring Ring, Ring Ring.

Me: Hello?
Colleague: It’s only me.
Me: Did you find them?
Person I want to strangle with my bare hands: Yeah, they were in the
normal place, I just didn’t look properly!
Me: Beeeeeeepppppppppppppp!!!!

7.05: back to bed,ZZZzzzzzzzzzz……

My wake up call sounds at 6am.

Now for your normal everyday kind of a guy who gets to go to bed after Emmerdale this is not a problem. But after six sixteen hour shifts and a Christmas party that didn’t want to go to bed until half four that same morning, a man will begin to struggle. People must think we are mad…… Maybe we are a little?

Three large over sugared mugs of tea and several dousings of eye wash later I’m ironed, polished and ready for another day.

Mornings are a funny thing. “What day is it?” is usually the first question I ask myself…… later to be confirmed by a fellow member of staff as the morning shift begins. The sweet aroma of a cooked breakfast drifts through the corridors as I take a seat at my desk to check the details of the day ahead. Conference at nine…… umm…. Scrambled eggs, meeting at ten….. Oooo crispy bacon, Observations at eleven……. That’s it, the sausages have got me. A perk of management……. Quality control!

It’s a pleasure to talk to our guests as they stumble down following the night before, and of course discretion is our courtesy and job. Every hotel has ‘character’ guests and it is my duty to listen to them. Today it is the guests from 302 as they tell me about their state of health whilst I am still digesting my fried mushrooms.

The morning is going well. Its eleven and no alarms have yet sounded. The electricity is still on, the hot water is hot and the guests are smiling. The girls on the phones are busy taking bookings, the kitchen is busy chopping and the vacuums can be heard humming quietly on each landing.

The pager bleeps……. In fact this pager never stops bleeping! A phone call, a guest. An unwell member of staff – oops, now make that three! A key for the safe, a ‘sorry I meant maintenance’. A contractor, a salesman, a question, a message. A note in the Diary, a problem to solve. A trigger happy receptionist and a Pack of rampaging day trippers. If you didn’t love this job….. you wouldn’t be able to do it!!

As the day goes by I remain buoyant as our conference guests have enjoyed their lunch, the residents made the most of the sunshine and fresh sea air. The swimming pools are shimmering, the windows and mirrors sparkling, the beds are made and the silverware polished. As evening draws in the team in the Compass Bar and Lounge are in full flow and the pianist is playing in the background. The show in the Gainsborough restaurant is underway and staff are still smiling and getting on with the job.

My day here draws to an end…… Hooray – it’s been another good day and in this business, you have to be thankful as the good days are what makes it worthwhile!